Best Kills & Worst Kills

1, 2, 3, 4. Keep that bag off the floor.
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Zeke
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Best Kills & Worst Kills

Post by Zeke » 17 May 2006 14:03

from this thread
xXLoss_of_ControlXx wrote:
Zeke wrote:One of the first things I tried was initiating body contact. I was kicked (lightly) in the stomach and chest a few times to try and discourage him from crossing over and getting that second kick.
but he got you back when your balls were in his
:oops: :oops: One of my worst exits ever!.

Reile's Revenge
I had successfully nullified one of Reile's double taps on a previous run in king square. Now back at king, I found myself defending against Reile in an adjacent square. He was about one step behind the line and kicked a pass high and it looked to be heading just past the line and into my square. I closed the distance with my left foot inches away from crossing over. I was trying to pick off the pass high to prevent him from redirecting the bag last second. Reile was too close to use an axe kick so I just raised my right knee as high as I could and I managed to get the bag before him. But he was still going for it with a toe kick. With my knee still raised I left my junk completely exposed and undefended. The blow was devastating, killing millions of innocent lives.

I screamed, dropped to my knees then fell on my back while clutching my mutilated manhood. In between my pathetic moans of pain I could hear roaring laughter and Reiles voice with a hint of sadistic satifaction, "By the way, your balls were in my square, CONTACT! YOU'RE OUT!"
Zeke

Funny movie titles if the movie were about poop:
Red
Fast & the Furious
The Green Mile
Children of the Corn
There Will be Blood

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underooninja
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Post by underooninja » 19 May 2006 10:26

HAHAHAHAHA GEEZ OH MY...HAHAHAHAHA
lonnie hobbs
o0((skyliners))0o
*it IS as bad as you think and they ARE out to get you*

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Oroza
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Post by Oroza » 28 May 2006 04:22

and they say footbag isnt a dangerous sport, was that at the bday jam? and we didnt get it on film?, alright.... reenactment

your balls are all over the place zeke
Plain, with everything.

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Post by Zac Jackson » 28 May 2006 18:36

o. . . . .m. . . . . .g your balls were massivly pwned




:P
Your next task: Go to the bathroom.
Wash your face.
Put your shoulders hunched upwards.
Look really, really slowly upwards towards the mirror like in the movies
And slap yourself in the face.
With your game face on.
And go shred with jim.
It'll work, trust me.
-Jay Boychuk

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xXLoss_of_ControlXx
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Post by xXLoss_of_ControlXx » 28 May 2006 20:53

playing at lane: this ass lazaro brought a soccerball out and we were playing 6square(w/the ball). This other kid Chris was in king, he serves it to Lazaro who fucken winds up for seconds and launched the ball straight at chris's face. Chris spun around in circles and was like "whered the ball go" with a bloody lip. It sucked cause chris was out.
Freddy Noinaj of the CIC?

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"Sweet" Simon

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Post by hacksterbator » 31 May 2006 20:36

my best kill ever was at footjam, i was pretty wasted and was in king square, and every one was just putting every thing at me, i had some bad contacts that sent me spinning and flailing about trying to controll it. i ended up geting it passed away from me but with my drunkeness and spinning i would up with my back to the circle. i hear the bag get kicked, feel it hit my lower back and i just flung my leg up backwards. i made contact with the sole of my shoe and it sent it flying up away from me clipping some guys ear and away from the circle. i know i got super lucky, and i was out next time, but it was still a pretty cool save.
A.G.

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Zeke
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Post by Zeke » 27 Jul 2006 21:08

Last Years Midwest Regionals. We were playing squares with 'no emotional outbursts'. Basically if you laughed, yelled or conveyed ANY kinf of emotion you were out. This is just a great rule with the right people... it's just non-stop laughter.

Anygay, one player was killed and I was next in line but I took a moment to compose myself before I jumped in. I started doing these mock stretches with my arms when little Alex Davidson takes in upon himself to cut in line and take the open square. As I was swinging my arms he walked right next to me and ...


SMACK!!!!!!!!!!!

...fore arm shiver to the face.

I turned around so see what the fuck just happened and the line behind me just errupted in laughter. I quickly checked to see if the kid was ok then looked back up into the court. EMPTY! EVERYONE was laughing hysterically and walked out of their squares. That's right, 3 kills and I wasn't even in the court yet! Well, 4 kills if you think about it...

What really made it bad was the the freakin kid thought they were all laughing at him so he started crying and ran to his dad. Then Reiles' g/f came over and asked, "OMG, Zeke are you hitting kids now? I heard it all the way from where I was sitting!"

...fucking Christ! :?

EDIT:
A little backround. Henry had jokingly posted before the event that he would not leave happy unless I kicked someone in the face. So when we finally started playing squares everyone seemed to be watching and waiting for me to fuck up and send HG home"happy". So the anticipation and the rule we happened to be using was really the cause of the laughter. I don't think people were laghing just cuz I hit a kid. I had to apologize to Scott and Alex for it all and I NEVER heard the end of it for the rest of the event and a few weeks after.
Last edited by Zeke on 26 Nov 2006 18:51, edited 1 time in total.
Zeke

Funny movie titles if the movie were about poop:
Red
Fast & the Furious
The Green Mile
Children of the Corn
There Will be Blood

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Zeke
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Post by Zeke » 26 Nov 2006 18:02

Saturday of this year's Midwest Regionals ended up with many players swiming at the beach and eating at Navy Pier. After lunch we set up my 16'x16' rope court on the well groomed grass in front of the Pier and had what was probably the best session most of us had ever played. Again, it's always a pity nobody tapes this stuff. Tom and I were playing in top form as we squared off many times with several mid-air jousts and long one on one duels.

In one play, Tom was king and I was in square 3. He had kicked a high pass out of bounds which looked to be heading about 2 feet out of my back left corner. I think most people would have just counted that as a loss and given up. Not Tom, not on this day. With near blinding speed he darted out of his square for the bag. Before I had played with Montreal 4S I would have stood by passively and hoped he would miss or over shoot my square. But having seen what they do to the poor and unexpecting fools that venture from the safety of their squares I decided to try it on Tom. I'll be the first to admit I'm jealous of this bastard-guy's skills at squares, not to mention my utter disgust to his arrogant taunting after kills so I had no problem deciding to block his attempt at the save.

He took one big step out of his square with the left foot and took off in the air with the right leg cocked. My left arm was closest but would not be strong enough to block anything he tried so I reached across with my right arm to make contact with his body and hopefully make him miss the kick. As I stretched out my arm he seemed to bend around it to avoid my attack completely! Impossibly, his upper body folded forward above my arm while his right leg snaked out underneath it to make a clean and improbable contact with the bag - ALL THIS IN THE FRIGGIN AIR! It seemed like I was stuck in slow motion as I watched the footbag land back inbounds, right in front of me. All I remember was dragging my sorry-ass to the back of the line where people talked about that play for another few rounds.

Image
Last edited by Zeke on 30 Nov 2006 08:42, edited 2 times in total.
Zeke

Funny movie titles if the movie were about poop:
Red
Fast & the Furious
The Green Mile
Children of the Corn
There Will be Blood

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CIC flurry
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Post by CIC flurry » 26 Nov 2006 18:14

LMAO!
Nice detailed story. Made me feel like I was there. I actually don't remember it though. :oops: I have a bad memory somewhat.

I remember Tuan got kicked in the face.

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QuantumBalance
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Post by QuantumBalance » 26 Nov 2006 22:50

My GOD It's not fair that I dont have people to practice with!!!!!!

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CIC flurry
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Post by CIC flurry » 27 Nov 2006 19:41

That picture is that shazzer!!
Myspace here we go.

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Post by Frank_Sinatra » 12 Jan 2007 08:25

Any kill with the "Crotch & Release" gladdens my baboon heart.

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Post by HG » 13 Jan 2007 10:56

My best kills are almost always against myself. I never know what im going to do next.






Crotch and Release. Pelvic thrust. Which IS it nathan?
JSACK wrote:alright well me and obara'bars, shredded our dicks off, since we are both in high school, obviously there is some sort of talent show

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Zeke
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Post by Zeke » 14 Jan 2007 19:14

Frank_Sinatra wrote:Any kill with the "Crotch & Release" gladdens my baboon heart.
I like to counter this with a flying crotch thrust of my own. I think it only works half the time but, man, what a show!
Zeke

Funny movie titles if the movie were about poop:
Red
Fast & the Furious
The Green Mile
Children of the Corn
There Will be Blood

Frank_Sinatra
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Post by Frank_Sinatra » 15 Jan 2007 07:43

HG wrote:Crotch and Release. Pelvic thrust. Which IS it nathan?
It goes by many names. Like Al Pacino in the Devil's Advocate.

Zeke: I think that's actually a good counter, not to mention hilarious. Maybe its good because its hilarious.

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Zeke
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Post by Zeke » 03 Mar 2007 10:26

There wasn't any one partucular kill that stood out when I played against Steve Goldberg at NYJ. It was more of a series of incredible saves on his part that initially left me completely dumbfounded then led to my subsequent death(s).

When we played, he stood slightly closer to the left side of his square leaving what I foolishly believed to be a big open target for me to exploit. The set up was to constantly attack his left side, alternating with his front and back corners for 3-4 volleys. Then double tapping to try and target his back right corner. There were countless times I was so sure he was out of range of my shot to even make a grazing contact with the bag much less get a controlled save!

He's deceptively quick and agile. All those years of Net that has made him a monster defending a relatively tiny 7 foot square area. It was the deep right outside save that astonished me. His right leg would shoot out (or just swing back from trying to defend the first contact of a double tap) behind him while bending deep with his support leg to allow him to get under the bag and get back in control.

I was usually frozen in shock and eventually loudly screaming out in utter frustration to even attempt to return his passes which landed uncontested in my square. There are very few players that I've seen that could make digs like that but he's the only that that could hit it consistantly every time. So he offered a simple tip: expect the defender to make the save. I was so confident my shot was going to land that I was preparing to call out my score and serve, not expecting the shot to be returned. I got burned just about every time.

Oddly enough I still catch myself stopping after a "good" shot. Can't wait to work on it during the warmer months... whenever that gets here :?
Zeke

Funny movie titles if the movie were about poop:
Red
Fast & the Furious
The Green Mile
Children of the Corn
There Will be Blood

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Zeke
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Post by Zeke » 22 Apr 2007 20:52

During one of today's games, Kamil was in king square defending a pass. He managed to get his foot under it and the bag popped high up out of bounds and behind him. He managed to run it down to make a save but hit it further away from the court! Again he manages pop it up but not back into play. He wildly kicked the footbag a few more times trying to get it into control. He was so determined to keep it in play he followed the bag into Freddy's square (not just toes on the line or a foot in the square - the whole of Kamil in Freddy's square!)

Kamil stood uncontested in 1sq and finally delivered a kill shot in its back left corner. Freddy stood by and watched himself get killed... from within his own square!!!!!!

The bag landed, no call was made and Freddy walked out. All the other players erupted in laughter! We could not believe what we just saw. Technically, I think Kamil should have been called for interference. Perhaps Freddy thought that Kamil worked hard to keep the bag in play and deserved the kill. Great play either way.
Zeke

Funny movie titles if the movie were about poop:
Red
Fast & the Furious
The Green Mile
Children of the Corn
There Will be Blood

RawSko
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Post by RawSko » 23 Apr 2007 17:39

I play foursquare with my non-footbag friends at lunch every day and things sometimes get bad. My buddy Dave cought it in his lap and whent over to dump it in the king square. He had it for a solid 10 seconds. Easily long enough for everyone to note the position of the bag and for everything to fill with silent suspense. Then our noble king, Chowder, sees where Dave is headed with the bag in his lap. Generaly, Chow's the nices/humblest guy ever, but he wanted to keep his position. He wound right up and booted Dave right in the balls with the force of a mule-kick. The bag(s) drops out of Dave's lap and he falls over on his back. It was awful... but epic.

I love our 4square games. I'm gonna post more about them here.
Ben Roscoe

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Post by Frank_Sinatra » 27 Jul 2007 05:52

Worst kill: the self suckout kill, when you don't connect with the bag on a basic kick. Grrr.

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Zeke
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Post by Zeke » 06 Sep 2007 10:48

Worst Kills:
Twitch wins 2 games of squares against me Reile & Tom yesterday @ Loyola...























Yeah, I dunno how the fuck that happened either.
Zeke

Funny movie titles if the movie were about poop:
Red
Fast & the Furious
The Green Mile
Children of the Corn
There Will be Blood

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