Stuff n Junk w/ Crowley

[Sporatical_Distractions]

HA! Thanks ken. I was wondering who still reads my blog since I don't kick much anymore. Thanks spam bot, for pulling info from almost 5 years ago. I ended up getting fired from Kirby on day 3 or so of training.

I want to make a video for the link of the day because I can hit all of them so far, but I hate the way my library's go pro makes the vids look. Otherwise I have to do it on my phone and that's annoying.
Went to do the links last night on my phone but ended up playing deer hunter 2014. I've killed thousands of animals. Lol.

Went to the gym today. Worked arms for the first time in 10 years. Had a hard time washing my shoulders and back afterwards.

Work was open for an extra 3 hours tonight because of finals. In the last half hour I discretely drank a half bottle of vodka because there was no one in the library. Either I have a high tolerance or the cold here a sobering. It's -18F right now. The other day a town an hour and a half away was -24. At the same time, central Antarctica was -22. So Montana is cold as fuck right now

Edit: I was doing deposits yesterday and rolled up the register tape into a tight roll. I simultaneously got 7 paper cuts on the pad of my middle finger and yelled "FUCK!!!" In the middle of the library. Forgot about it and used hand sanitizer today.... Brutal. And got blood all over the deposit.

[Sporatical_Distractions]

2 posts one night. Going for a Montana record

If I threw a Montana jam in the summer would any of you come? Our airport is expensive because it's very small but flying into/ out of Spokane would be feasible. There will be no cash prizes, but I could show people some sweet mountain shit. Who would come? Could do shred 30, big 3, sick 1, rippin run (which is my favorite of all time), routines if we have someone else that can judge, and a whole lot of hanging out. Disc golf. Mountain adventures. Dive bars. Who's interested?

Edit: it's not gonna be like the old montana freestyle jams with juggling, live music, hula hoops, fire poi, gymnastics, Kung fu, breakdancing, food vendors, clothing vendors. It's going to be sleeping at my house and playing footbag

[C-Fan]

Most summers I'd say yes, but this summer is unlikely because I'm getting married. Next summer perhaps?

[Sporatical_Distractions]

Word.

Today is the last day of finals and the library is insanely slow. So a buddy and I started writing sister act 3. It's more about a magical camper van than sister act 3. in fact, it has nothing to do with sister act 3, but whatever. Here's what we've thrown together in the last hour for our masterpiece.

Twas a whimsical eve, and majesty filled the twilight. Destiny shined among the stars, whilst MacDre pondered in wonderment – “Where art thou Vanagon, my soul yearns for thee.” But little did he know, the camper van was closer than he could fathom, and he was about to partake in a journey for the ages.

Chapter 1
“Sup” MacDre said with anticipation dripping out of his tongue.
“Nothin’” Crag muttered under his gurgling breath.
“Chillin’ Bro”
“You?”

Chapter 2
“Significant Other is not the best Limp Bizkit album!”
“Whatever dude, Daddy Durst straight kills it.”
“Chocolate Starfish all the wa…” but Crag could not finish his sentence before crashing into the van in front of him, spilling NOS energy drink and Carlo Rossi all over the interior of their vehicle. Red fairy dust filled the air as MacDre’s station wagon crumbled into the magnificent wonderment upon them.
Immediately after impact a tall, dark handsome African-American wizard staggered out of the mystical vehicle.”
“Dude, is that Sinbad?”
“That’s totally Sinbad bro, tight! But I totally spilled my NOS bro!”
But there was no time for small talk. The radio was playing Matchbox Twenty and it was time to investigate.
Crag jumped out of the vehicle and shouted “Sinbad, I love first kid!”
But the wizard was in no shape for conversation, as blood was covering his adidas tracksuit.
“Tight!” exclaimed Crag.
“I think we need to get him to the hospital after we get his autograph”
“We’re gonna have to take that totally sick van, my car is T, O, T totalled bro, my mom is gonna be so pissed.”
“Now we can never go back home. Looks like we’re on the lam now bro! Pass me that joint”
“Lam a dam!”

Chapter 3
“Sup?!” exclaimed MacDre to the towering terrible actor known as Sinbad. There was no reply from Sinbad.
“Sup BRO!” Crag shrieked repeatedly at a glossy eyed Sinbad.
Crag and MacDre then knew that they were in great peril, for the almighty Sinbad had fallen. Putting their heads together, Crag and MacDre came up with a plan that could be crazy enough to work. First they would check out Timecop with Jean-Claude Van Damme, then they would buy some MD 20/20, and get really drunk, and then check on Sinbad.
“What flavor of MadDog should we get Bro?” Crag asked curiously.
“Dragon Punch duh breh.” Macdre replied.
“Ok.” Said Crag.
“Is Timecop on Netflix?”
“I think it used to be, but I think if you have the full subscription where you can get DVD’s delivered you can get it that way.”
“Ok.”
“I think my uncle Duane has a copy of Timecop on Laserdisc we could borrow.”
“Ok.”
“Whoa, did you see that chick? Dayum!”
“Whoa.”
As the two pondered how to get Timecop and what flavor of MD 20/20 to procure, they heard a rustling from the back. Sinbad had collapsed and began foaming furiously out of his goateed face. Panic set in as Crag and MacDre had begun to realize the consequences of the accident.
“Dude you killed Sinbad!” Crag accusingly shouted.
“No way man, if you hadn’t been so tarded and thought that Chocolate Starfish was a better album we wouldn’t be in this jam! Anyway, the only thing that killed Sinbad was his career. OHHH!!!!”
“Sick burn bro.”
“Fuck you man you always do this!
“Well we need to do something, we can’t sit here and blame each other… they were both good albums!”
“Okay man you’re right I love you. Lets haul Sinbad’s big, slightly out of shape body onto the bed in the camper van.”
So the two brave souls grabbed Sinbad and began to violently drag him into the camper van.

Chapter 4
As the credits roll on Time Cop, MacDre turns to Crag and asks “You goin fishin? Because you make me want to grab my rod”.
“Well Fuck, we need to get more Mad Dog”.
“Shit! We forgot about Sinbad!”
MacDre excused himself from Time Cop to go into the back of the camper van to check on Sinbad. As he made his way towards the bed, a strange presence came over his body. Something was not right. Macdre flipped up the blanket on the bed of the camper van, and Sinbad was gone! All that was left was a pile of pillows that looked exactly like Sinbad!
“We are out of MD 20/20, cigs, and cool ranch doritos bro, fuck Sinbad lets do us for now.”

Chapter 5
The two heroes emerged from 711 with two plastic bags filled with an assortment of majesty. As the two warriors left the store they began to tear open bags of bugles and begin to ‘make it rain’. As the disgusting bugle shaped corn shit logs fell from the heaven’s a thought came to Crag’s brilliant head,” Dude, where did Sinbad go?”
MacDre just finished taking a swig of Dragon Punch when a thought also occurred to him,”I wonder what Crag’s mom’s boobs look like.”
As the two pondered their existence, crag farted. It was the most glorious and smelly fart ever. A tear slowly fell down MacDre’s face.
The two went back into the camper van and noticed that Sinbad was missing. Crag farted again, but this time it was neither glorious nor smelly. “Fuck dude, where did Sinbad go?”
As Crag’ looked around the camper van, another smell wafted into his nose. “Is that piss!? Dude, Sinbad pissed all over the cushions. No bueno bro!” He really put the bad in Sinbad. No bueno. No bueno at all.
The two decided to put the key into the ignition and see where the camper van would take them. After several full attempts, our heroes realized that there was no more gas in the vehicle, besides the gas in Crag’s butt.
“Hold on a sec bro. So gas gets you drunk right?” Asked Crag with a twinkle in his eye.
“Well yeah.” Said Macdre.
“And MadDog gets you drunk too right?”
“Duuhhhhhh.”
“And camper vans run on gas right?”
“Get to the point bro”
“Therefore, camper vans run on Mad Dog!”
“Whoa!!!”

Chapter 6
Taking turns expelling maddog and piss into the gas station, Crag and Macdre knew there was a mystical presence among them, not just Crag’s gas. The two knew that something special was about to happen. Something really fucking special.
They grabbed some Boone’s Farm, hopped in the van, inserted the latest Modern Savage cassette, and put the pedal to metal.

[Sporatical_Distractions]

Been working a ton. Haven't explored the outdoors in about a month
I've been working, reading, cleaning, and sleeping a lot.

Played footbag the other day for the first time in a month.

Realized that I could someday hit this trick:
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d6RELjn4Y2Q[/youtube]

[Asmus]

Woah! Nice first try. And nice to see some video.

I like your sock style.

[Sporatical_Distractions]

Thanks moosey!

I'd love to see any of those on video.

WHIFF!
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PVkCF38YH30[/youtube]

[Sporatical_Distractions]

In an effort to quit smoking and take a month off for drinking, played footbag tonight instead of going out. Here's a brief one shot Stephen Barnes


[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xx-nzfkhfyI[/youtube]

[F[uns]tylin' Eclectic]

Theres them videos the dain't work on my phone! :B

Damn, you were stoopid close to Clown on that first try. I bet you'll hit it soon.

[Sporatical_Distractions]

I'm detoxing this month, and my body hates me. I've quit smoking, and for the month of January I have given up drinking, dairy, meat, and bread (specifically simple carbs). And I've exercised about 6 hours in the last 2 days. I've been a constant smoker for about 7 years and the longest I've gone without drinking in the last 9 years has been 5 days.

I usually only have anxiety attacks twice a year. They are completely spontaneous with no environmental trigger and other than one other time, have always happened when I've been alone which is good. My entire experience of reality becomes surreal and I'm not sure if i'm in a dream state or the real world. My brain races and I can't comprehend much at all. I also speak at speeds too fast to understand. It's not a pleasant experience and I probably look like i'm confused and mentally ill. Just had one at work and feel like I may have another before the day is done. I may be pushing my body too far too fast.

[Sporatical_Distractions]

Another dropped trick, but I've been inspired to play more lately. Realized that I could hit this some day

Edit: youtube doesn't like the vid. After watching again, pretty sure the 2nd dex is the. Trying to upload again. MAybe this will work later. Gyro hi plains attempt http://youtu.be/YWq4aBQu7jI

[F[uns]tylin' Eclectic]

10 seconds longer than I'm used to!

Sick dude. I think that looks very doable for you. That's a hard trick too. Props on the dope attempt

[Sporatical_Distractions]

I legit got soulja boys number from a mutual friend and texted him:
If someone took a run at lebron James when he wasn't expecting it (this guy is 145 lbs, and tackled him behind the knees, like in a grocery store line or some shit, would lebron fall down?

[Sporatical_Distractions]

Going to play footbag tonight.

Started making a list of the movies i've watched in 2014, and realized I watch a lot of bad movies that are good.
-Kickboxer
-Terror Firmer
-Sgt Kabukiman NYPD
-Dumpster Baby
-True Lies
-Rabid Grannies
-Encino Man
-Yeti - a Gay Love Story

[C-Fan]

If someone took a run at lebron James when he wasn't expecting it (this guy is 145 lbs, and tackled him behind the knees, like in a grocery store line or some shit, would lebron fall down?

If it was a deaf guy, would it make a sound?

[Sporatical_Distractions]

Got jumped on Friday night. My head still hurts so I may go to the hospital tomorrow to see if there's a concussion. I was just walking down the street with my friends and a case of beer. There were 3 dudes across the street walking kind of behind us. I looked over after awhile and one was trying to cross in front of us with a swollen posture. I slowed down for a second and then everything went blurry. Some dude ran up behind us and punched me right in the temple. I looked up in confusion and one of my friends was getting double-teamed. I went over to help and some guy came at me. They then took off with our beer. They never said a word to us. We never said anything to them beforehand. The cops came. They never got the guys. A nearby gas station may have surveillance though.

I want to shred but won't due to this headache I still have.

edit: If it is a concussion, it'll be somewhere around my 7th or 8th one.

[F[uns]tylin' Eclectic]

I saw the pics on facebook. Hope you and your buddy are alright.

You gotta make one of these suckers and carry it around with you. I carry mine any time I go out. The world is becoming a real fucked up place...

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eyoLpz5IvtI[/youtube]

Knock a mothahfuckah out his nickabockahs.

[Sporatical_Distractions]

One of the other library supervisors quit, so none of us are getting time off until July. That means no vegas jam, and most likely no u.s. open. I'm pretty fucking pissed.

[Sporatical_Distractions]

Figured out a way to go to the Vegas jam. I'm going to play like shit though. I've been playing less than when I used to, and was already playing very infrequently ... If that makes sense. Haven't played in a month and a half. I used to rarely miss toe ss grifter and thought of a trick today based off that. Downtime toe ss illusioning opp symp mirage. Like toe same Merlin with the first dex reversed. Haven't tried it. It may be too much for me but want to try it. My dad has the internet and a laptop. Would like to do an online session soon. It will be tiltless since I haven't done shit but try and eat the biggest burgers I can find, drink more beer than I should, read comics, and nap a lot

[Muffinman]

Do all of those things in the last sentence while livestreaming