scare your boss...

hacksterbator · Post by **hacksterbator** » 31 Mar 2005 23:23

okay, i wrote this up just now and have fitted it with a header, footer, yada yada yada and have set up an elaborate plan to scare the crap out of my boss. i WAS infact electrocuted tonight, but it was only just a shock, BUT i played it up and the supervisor made a call to the executive chef to tell him what happened and left him a voice mail. the following is what my devious mind has come up with...

Mr. X

Re: DCH File 2005.03.247 A.Grant - Work Place Injury Claim
Dear Sir;
This letter is to inform you that our client, Mr. Andrew Grant, has advised us of a workplace incident that occurred on March 31, 2005 at your premises and has instructed our firm to seek remedy under the laws and statutes of The Province of Manitoba.
During this incident, Mr. Grant indicated he was electrocuted and sustained what he initially considered to be minor injuries resulting from contact with faulty electrical fixtures during the normal performance of his duties in the kitchen of the Prairie Ink Restaurant and Bakery. An examination conducted by the emergency medical staff at the Health Sciences Center earlier today has revealed far more extensive injuries, including second degree burns to the right hand as well as substantial nerve damage to the right hand, forearm, shoulder and upper cervical vertebrae. A follow up examination with a neuromuscular specialist has been scheduled for 10:25 AM, Monday, April 4th 2005, to determine the full extent of our clients injuries resulting from the aforementioned incident.
In your capacity as Executive Chef for the restaurant you are solely liable for the health and safety of all staff in your employ. Based on legal precedent pertaining to workplace injury claims brought before the Court of Queens Bench, we feel that our client is in a very advantageous position with respect to claims for compensation and damages resulting from the incident.
Please be advised, our client is intent on seeking satisfactory compensation for treatment of his injuries and any loss of long term earning potential. This letter is sent without prejudice, govern yourself accordingly.
Should you wish to discuss and/or settle this matter in advance of legal proceedings being brought against you and McNally Robinson Book Sellers LTD. I can be reached by telephone at our offices at 954-6264.
Yours at law,

I. M. Dewey, QC, DCH LLP
CC: CEO XXX

feel free to fiddle with this in any way, add or change names, injuries, what ever, and screw with your boss!

delakong · Post by **delakong** » 01 Apr 2005 05:59

Oh that's sooooo great. I wish I could watch your boss read it.

mosher · Post by **mosher** » 01 Apr 2005 06:13

Oh Andrew, that is so brutal!

Do it! do it!

mc · Post by mc » 01 Apr 2005 06:36

oh man. your boss might not appreciate that... haha, what a burn...

junkyardjew · Post by **junkyardjew** » 01 Apr 2005 08:30

that's the best april fool i've hear of ever. so sweet...

Jdigges · Post by **Jdigges** » 01 Apr 2005 09:12

hahah nice man. thats the best april fools joke i've seen. Matts right, i really dont think your boss will appreciate that

hacksterbator · Post by **hacksterbator** » 01 Apr 2005 10:39

hahaha, i'm taking it the next step. i'm having the owner come in and give it to chef and ask him what this is all about!!! i'm so getting fired!!!