last night was sooo fucked up. i don't even know where to begin but i'll try.
i was chilling at a buddies whom i hadn't hung out with in quite awhile. we were tossing back a few beers and hearing stories from one of my buddies that had just gotten back from China. Time passed and we decided to get more beer. when we got back, his little sister had some friends over that had brought beer. they left to get food and we drank all of our beer and their beer while they were gone. when they came back we left to go get more beer and that's when the craziness started happening. for some reason, i thought it would be a good idea if my friend took a running charge at me with half a watermelon and hit me in the head as hard as he could with the edible part. my whole body ended up soaking wet in watermelon and it looks like i put gel in my hair. he then took another running charge and hit me in the chest with it full force. what a bad idea. we ran out of beer and so We went to this place called the "Kum & Go" who will sell to anyone if you simply show an ID. we had to get across the street to get to it but they were paving the road. I sprinted across the burning hot asphalt (which the construction worker told me was over 300 degrees) and burned the fuck out of the bottom of my lavers. There is no more traction. it all melted off. good thing I don't shred with lavers anymore
my buddy was inside buying beer and there was this straggly drunk man outside that me and the kid whose beer I drank started talking to. His name was robert, he had a mullet, he was from Mississippi, and he was
trashed . he told us stories while he was pissing on a dumpster. that's nothing strange until you think about where the dumpster was (right in front of the kum & go on one of the busiest streets in missoula. We shot the shit with robert for about forty minutes and invited him to chill with us but he was in a movie and left to chug some tall boys of steel reserve which he gave to us cause he was already too hammered (I know...... Steelies right?)
we had gotten back to his house and had a few beers. my buddy who owned the house disappeared for pretty much the rest of the night. his little sister offered me $5 to give her a ride to pick up one of her friends and I thought "Okay, i'm poor. i could really use this money". it was on this car ride that i discovered something was terribly wrong here. Andrew's little sister and all their friends who are getting smashed are going to be incoming freshman in High School!" She stole a bunch of beer and chugged it in the backseat where I wouldn't see her. her friend ended up not being able to hang out and this drunk 14 year old in my backseat ran outside and peed about 1 foot from the car on the #1 busiest road in missoula "reserve st". "this is fucked up. i'm taking care of my buddy's drunk-assed little sister who isn't even a freshman in high school yet. if i would have been pulled over, i would have gone to jail for sure. the cop would have saw a 19 yr old with a drunk 14 yr old in his back seat and i would have been fucked. riding back, we stopped at one of my friends house and chilled for a little bit so i could pick up a tube for river floating. the 14 yr old was stumbling all over the place trying to make it to the bathroom for round two. she got out and i was like "this is fucked up. you should not be drinking. you are too young. why are you drinking anyway? how did you get so drunk? i saw you have two beers." she told me that she stole some in my backseat and drank them
on the ride back to drop her off and get out of this whole situation, she asked if she could have another beer. I said "No! you shouldn't have even had one beer. there is no way i'm giving you another beer and contributing to the drunkeness of a 14 year old. that goes against all of my morals and i'm
not giving you another beer." sure enough, she stole one and ran inside when we got to my buddies house. i had to run her down and pry the beer out of her hand. i then called my friend and told him about his little sister and how fucked up this night was and left. he came home later with this girl that had stalked me last summer and tried to straighten out his sister. the stalker called me (mistake #1 chelsea, i obviously avoid you at all costs. how did you get my new #?) and fucking begged me to come back. "NO! I don't like you, you are super creepy and i don't want to hang out" I didn't say that but i wish I would have. i got home and was locked out of my house. i had to knock on my parents window to let me in at 3 in the morning. they were pissed as all hell, i was pretty drunk, super blazed, was just in a bad situation that could have equaled jail time. what a fucked up night
started a string with matador. hit blender, bsos spinning osis, came really close to spinning pdx blender, did tons of bops. now my body is just exhausted but i have work for a few more hours. i can't wait to go home, eat ridiculous quantities of chili, and then sleep all day.
, i almost got a phoenix as well. I then took off the ankleweights and I couldn't kick for the life of me. i tried smear and launched to footbag into the ceiling full force 
