Keggers!

Slowsis · Post by **Slowsis** » 22 Sep 2006 07:31

So university and college are back in session.......any good kegger stories?

Iron Clad Ben · Post by **Iron Clad Ben** » 22 Sep 2006 08:46

The best kegger stories are not remembered the next day.

I went to college in Pennsylvania, which unlike Texas, has a real winter. The first night of one second semester in January, I went to this rager. It was about 25 degrees F (about -5C) out so I wore my winter coat. Anyway, I went to the party, got totally blitzed and stumbled home sometime around 4AM

The next morning I woke up at 4:30PM. I was hungry so I put on a t-shirt and I went outside to go to the dining hall. Holy crap, it's cold out, duh! Wait a sec, where is my coat? I thought about it and was able to vaguely recall taking off my jacket and later my t-shirt at the party the night before. I had walked home barechested in 25 deg F / -5 deg C weather and was too drunk to notice. LOL!!!!111 Well I had no choice but to put on a sweatshirt and walk over to where the party had been, freezing the whole way. When I got there was puke over half the floor and it reeked of spilled beer. A rager it was indeed. I said "dude I think I left my jacket here last night". "Oh ok bro, check the pile there, see if you can find it". I guess I wasn't the only one.

HG · Post by HG » 22 Sep 2006 13:05

I was at a friends house (i dont drink)

This one kid had some football pads on, sitting on a table. A kid asked what time it was, this girl he was hitting on says "Its 11:35 " and the kid with the football pads goes "Nope its 11:36"

"COURTNEY IS NEVER WRONG!!!!" from the kid who asked what time it was. Then he speared the football pads kid right off the table.. He flew through the air like 7 feet back and he was just sitting in the corner laughing.

Pengu · Post by **Pengu** » 22 Sep 2006 15:03

Oh.... to remember the stupidity of my first year...

In my first year, I was drunk at 10am at a pancake kegger and passed out by noon at the homecoming football game. Then I was led to some house where more beer ensued and I woke up later that evening completely purple, sitting outside my rez and not being allowed back into my rez room because I was purple from head to toe. I was handed a box of Tide with Bleach and the 3 of us who were purple and drunk stumbled over to Lake Ontario and jumped into the freezing September water and cleaned ourselves until we were depurpled enough to go back to rez. I woke up the next morning on the couch in the shared kitchen without a clue of why I was there and was told I couldn't find my keys and couldn't get into my room.

It's really true you have to get this stuff out of your system before you realize you don't even like getting drunk. Now the Queen's homecoming tradtion has lost its appeal.

Guest_1 · Post by **Guest_1** » 22 Sep 2006 16:52

I picked up a friend I used to go to high school with and invited a ton of people to this kegger at a house in a rich suburb of Minneapolis.

I don't drink anymore, so I got to be the sober driver! Picked her up, hooked a ton of people up with directions, and showed up.

So we all had a rocking good time chilling, playing pool, dancing in the disco room, and playing in the hot tub. One of the cute girls who was making out with all the other girls in the hot tub came up to me and was like, "Hey! Do you have a girlfriend?" I nodded as a tear came to my eye

Then, the girl I invited from Psych class showed up. With her little sister [16] who I met a few weeks before at a party that I got krunked at met her there. She assisted me in making french toast [wasted] ; I invited her also, not even knowing they were related!

Those sisters brought a girl I knew from high school and who is friends with all my friends! It was crazy!

Parties=more fun sober!

james_dean · Post by **james_dean** » 22 Sep 2006 18:02

Pengu wrote:It's really true you have to get this stuff out of your system before you realize you don't even like getting drunk. Now the Queen's homecoming tradtion has lost its appeal.

so true.

I got ridiculously wasted off a keg once, like, "What the hell happened?" kind of wasted. I had crap drawn all over my face and stank like crazy when my parents picked me up from the party, they were pretty peeved. I found out about 2 months later that someone had handed me a glass of absinthe and I downed the whole lot.... oh.... it all makes sense now...

<<< over drunkenness

BainbridgeShred · Post by **BainbridgeShred** » 23 Sep 2006 01:51

Most of my bad stories involve JD, not keg's.

I agree with Peng though.

bluntobj3ct · Post by **bluntobj3ct** » 23 Sep 2006 23:30

gettin ready for a big night:

not for the public:

public:

not for the public:

annndd we had over a thousand people through there that night- AINT NOTHIN BUT A GANGSTA PAAAARTAY:

yours truly- (dumbass mode):

san diego state... what a... fuckin place lol

memories

HG · Post by HG » 24 Sep 2006 16:11

And a 6 pack of naty ice.

yeah i get thirsty ok

a gamecube

Yeah its a shaped like a cube, and you can play games on it, whats wrong with that

Tsiangkun · Post by **Tsiangkun** » 24 Sep 2006 20:13

I forgot to assemble my tap lines before connecting them today and sent gallons of beer all over my floor.

WOOOOOOOOO !!!!!!! All the clean up of a kegger, and none of the party.

PegLegHolly · Post by **PegLegHolly** » 24 Sep 2006 21:20

once i went to a keg party at this guys house named luke and we were doing keg stands. one of the times i was upside down this guy came in with a life jacket on and he was soaked from head to toe. i kept drinking cause we were having a contest. turns out the kid had gone outside (it waas about 2am) and he got on a jet ski and rode around on the lake and when he was coming back he crashed it into the shore but won 50 bucks because everyone was betting that he couldnt do it.

and then later we were hitting of this guys hooka and my buddy blair was talking on my phone to our friend kj. he chugged his beer and told kj he was taking the next hit for him. when he took the hit he choked and puked all over the front of himself. it was nasty.

the last keg i went to it was a pirate indian keg and on my way home i got arrested for dui. my mug shot was me in a pirate outfit and my cell mate thought it was hilarious.

keg+driving=jail.

jail=i dont drink anymore

Caleb · Post by **Caleb** » 25 Sep 2006 07:46

Everyone at Funtastik loved this story so I might as well post it:

My two roommates and I were walking home from a party, comfortably intoxicated, at 2am. "Let's get Antoon's!" we all said. (It's $4.80 for a large Antoon's pizza.........glorious!!!!) Then we decided to make the genius move of cutting through an alley to shortcut back to the house. As we round the corner, 4 intimidating African-American men (I'm such a scared white boy) surprise us.

"Yo dawg, we need that pizza." Is heard from the shadows, and our prize of the evening (the 5 dollar pizza) was snatched from our hands as the 4 hooligans run down the street. Naturally, having grown beer muscles for the evening and assuming my 2 best friends in the world are behind me, I sprint after them. I caught up to two of them and as the one states "Yo, let's beat this white boy's ass." I realize my two friends are nowhere to be found. So I turn to basically yell at my friends and call them innappropriate names to be echoed in public. It's at this point that the culprits give me the slip and hop a fence into a parking lot that secures their almost certain escape. I sprint after them, and to my disbelief I catch them. I grabbed the one on with the pizza by the back of the shirt, horse-collar him, and punch him square in the temple. The poor sap collapses on the ground in a disoriented mess. Victim #2 comes my way (this is wear the alchohol makes things a little fuzzy). He runs in my general direction with aim to either tackle me, help his friend, or secure the pizza. In any case, I swept his legs out from under him mid-stride. A piece of pizza flew from his hands as he fell back. As I claim my promised prize with glazed over, bloodshot eyes the two beta-males run off into the distance never to be seen again........and cheers can be heard through the air from the nearby bar and skater punks.......and the flavors of tomato sauce and cheap mozzarella fill my war-torn belly.

In retrospect this may be the dumbest thing I've ever done in my life. I could've easily been stabbed for a $5 pizza. But I came out on top so oh well.

Iron Clad Ben · Post by **Iron Clad Ben** » 25 Sep 2006 09:01

Caleb wrote:I sprint after them, and to my disbelief I catch them. I grabbed the one on with the pizza by the back of the shirt, horse-collar him, and punch him square in the temple. The poor sap collapses on the ground in a disoriented mess. Victim #2 comes my way (this is wear the alchohol makes things a little fuzzy). He runs in my general direction with aim to either tackle me, help his friend, or secure the pizza. In any case, I swept his legs out from under him mid-stride. A piece of pizza flew from his hands as he fell back.

Sounds like straight out of an episode of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turles

Caleb · Post by **Caleb** » 25 Sep 2006 09:15

Carl Winslown3d!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HAHAAHAAHAHHAHA! I laughed hystarically in the middle of the office at that! I don't even know why I think that's SO funny. I actually owe my company money because of how long I laughed at that and was unable to work.

BainbridgeShred · Post by **BainbridgeShred** » 25 Sep 2006 15:17

He runs in my general direction with aim to either tackle me, help his friend, or secure the pizza.

LMAO

Zeb Jackson · Post by **Zeb Jackson** » 25 Sep 2006 16:21

lol awesome story

mc · Post by mc » 26 Sep 2006 09:59

badass story, Caleb. Way to score your pie back.

Wasabi · Post by **Wasabi** » 26 Sep 2006 10:53

That was one crazy Funtastiks!