It was so awesome hanging with you this weekend. It's great that even though you are one of the top shredders (if not THE top) in the world, you're still cool and fun to be around.
It was great shredding with you that last day. My brain is still trying to process the stuff you hit.
Thanks for the talk/motivation in the finals, I wouldn't have done as well if you didn't take the time to help.
I like your humor. You're quite funny in general, but intermittently in real life prolly cuz we don't get a chance to hang. I'll go to an event I'm not running some time, ad maybe then we'll get the chance. Holler, Tom.
Thank you guys for the comments. I like you both very much.
So if I was in the habit of dating my blogs I would date this one with a 2008, thus, the new year. I rang in the new year with my parents, sitting on the floor of the living room with a peanut butter sandwich, wearing satin pajamas I got for Christmas. We watched Dick Clark who looks like he might not make it to 2009. I felt a little old remembering him when he was young and youthful, out on the streets, his head dwarfed by earmuffs that looked more like two fluffy pillows strapped to his head.
Last New Year's Eve I was in Chicago, sitting on Zeke and Riley's floor eating candy with Gray Chadwick, surrounded by my friends as we struggled to get the TV fixed in time to see the ball drop. That image is quite clear now that I think about it. We had ran to 7-11 across the icy streets to get snacks and headed back to catch the ball drop. That memory might have escaped if I did not write it down right now. For that I am thankful.
I went to my aunt's today for our normal New Year's Day dinner. It was pork and apple sauce, which is supposed to give you money in the new year, at least that is what my cousin's wife always tells us. None of us are rolling in dough yet, so perhaps this year all that pork will tip the scales. Here's hoping.
I sat on my aunt's couch for most of the day stitching bags, not talking. My mother was upset with me for not socializing, but what would I have talked about? I ran out of conversation topics when I saw all those people at Christmas, and I didn't feel like reciting my Chicago adventures to people who pretend to care because they are supposed to.
I saw Juno tonight, it's a movie about a high school girl who gets pregnant. It was very good but it made me feel old. I don't have a locker anymore, or books that I carry down the hall, or the girl that I pass often and look at. I feel older now, like I have passed the prime state of my life and am not looking back wishing I would've played things differently in high school. I liked the movie, but I walked out feeling empty and frustrated.
Someone sometime must have said something like "If you spend your time focusing on the past you cannot fully live you're future". Or maybe it was more like, "don't live in the past". I guess the main idea there is that if you are so busy wishing you would've done things back then you won't ever do things now, and the deadly train of regret keeps moving. I feel as if I am on that train most of the time.
My body felt weak all day, not just on the outside which is still sore from the hours of shred, but on the inside. I feel tired and maybe a little lonely. I have friends here, I do, and I do at school too, but when I connect more with a lit screen shining in the night instead of other humans it can't help but bother me.
I've been carrying around a deck of cards a lot now, just running through standard card things that build hand strength and quickness. I love magic, I really do. I love the spark in people's eyes when you fool them. It felt amazing when Goldberg couldn't understand a trick, a man who seems to know everything baffled that the jack of diamonds in his hand was now under my foot. That made me really happy. In reality I'm not even good. I get by sometimes on distractions because I am a good talker, but at the heart of it I am a poor magician. But this is because I am new, and I realize this and take some sort of pleasure out of being a novice at something. It is humbling to be back to square one of an activity.
I was thinking about having a New Year's resolution, something that I could really focus on and try to prevail with. Then I thought about why I needed a special day to make a change. If you truly want to change you could do it on a Wednesday in the middle of April, you don't need a holiday. This is a common thought I'm sure. Either way, I have not drank soda for the past 24 hours which means it could be my New Year's Resolution. I am partly joking, for I do love a Dr. Pepper at 3 in the morning.
If I really could make some resolutions they would be something like this:
- Step outside of my comfort zone more.
- Greet people, do not wait for them to come around to you.
- Look people dead in the eyes when I meet them, remember their name and repeat it and then reuse it to let them know you care about them.
- Get more confidence.
- Tell people how I feel more.
- Do more random acts of kindness. Be selfless.
- Value and nurture the good friendships I already have.
- Make new friendships and maintain them.
- Live each day to the fullest.
- Eat better, live better, think more positively.
- Live for myself and not for others.
I realized upon rereading that these are hard things. One of these could take you all year. Perhaps I will do little bits of each. No matter what, if I work on all of these areas my life in '08 will be a little better.
I have been told many times I am a pessimistic person. That I find the flaws in things and focus on the negatives. I have responded with the idea that I am a realist, and I feel it is a waste to put my time into things that are bound to fail. But this hurts me. It hurts me when people view me as cold and negative and not caring, and I think this would be my biggest resolution, to be more optimistic. To have more faith in people and situations and to look on the bright side. I will try to do that more.
So that is personal stuff that I want to work on, but since this is a footbag forum perhaps I should think of something to say in regards to footbag in 08 under the David Clavens sphere of things. In regards to that, I have no clue. I will continue to play with Scott on Mondays and Wednesdays I hope. I hope I can find more enjoyment in the sport.
It is late now, and I have began to creep into the minutes that make up the 2nd day of 2008. I can see my neighbors house from my room window, a dark shadow standing in an even darker night. It is cold out I'm sure, and if anything I should be thankful that I have a roof over my head, because a lot of people don't and I forget this a lot. I complain quite often and really I have nothing to complain about. Maybe my biggest resolution should be to value what I have. Find value in the snow I can kick on my way to class, the music in my ears on the bus, the people that care if I live or die, and the way my cat runs up the stairs early in the morning.
Good read, Dave. I just wrote out a long post about how I'm in a similar position (graduating in one semester) and how I used to think about the past/future a bunch and then I hit back on the browser and completely deleted it. But anywho, Worrying is like a rocking chair. It gives you something to do, but it doesn't get you anywhere (write that down). But seriously, I think all of your resolutions are good steps in improving yourself as a person and I'm glad you wrote them out cause I haven't even thought about what mine are.
I've also been thinking about starting to get into magic / slight of hand. How do you recommend getting started?
Very good read. I felt compelled to post a response, though you probably have no idea who i am, but no matter. reading your post made me think a lot about my plans for the future. All of your resolutions are things that can apply to everybody. Because everybody has problems with one thing or another, be it finding truth in yourself, or finding hope in things that seem hopeless. But whatever you strive for, if you persevere and cling to the idea or truth you are working towards, nothing can't be accomplished. I'm sure you can accomplish every resolution you made for yourself, all you have to do is remember why you decided to make that change, and walk towards every new day as an opportunity to exercise your new belief, rather then standing still. Regretting the past.
david wrote:Greet people, do not wait for them to come around to you.
- Look people dead in the eyes when I meet them, remember their name and repeat it and then reuse it to let them know you care about them.
- Get more confidence.
- Tell people how I feel more.
- Do more random acts of kindness. Be selfless.
- Value and nurture the good friendships I already have.
vs.
david wrote:
- Live for myself and not for others.
I guess better wording would have been like "live for myself vs. what others want for me". On one hand I am taking a more other-oriented approach, that's true. But on the other side I want to be more focused on my goals rather than what others see fit for me to do. I guess it is a fine line.
I saw Juno tonight, it's a movie about a high school girl who gets pregnant. It was very good but it made me feel old. I don't have a locker anymore, or books that I carry down the hall, or the girl that I pass often and look at. I feel older now, like I have passed the prime state of my life and am not looking back wishing I would've played things differently in high school. I liked the movie, but I walked out feeling empty and frustrated.
Someone sometime must have said something like "If you spend your time focusing on the past you cannot fully live you're future". Or maybe it was more like, "don't live in the past". I guess the main idea there is that if you are so busy wishing you would've done things back then you won't ever do things now, and the deadly train of regret keeps moving. I feel as if I am on that train most of the time.
My body felt weak all day, not just on the outside which is still sore from the hours of shred, but on the inside. I feel tired and maybe a little lonely. I have friends here, I do, and I do at school too, but when I connect more with a lit screen shining in the night instead of other humans it can't help but bother me.
I know exactly how you felt in those 3 paragraphs. I feel the same way most of the time. I'd say I have friends, but not really. I have people I associate with at school and stuff, but none of them I really connect with. In fact, one of my friends that I feel like I could've connected with is now in India for the next 5 years. I also think the past is where my mind is. Especially this year, when Christmas hit. Actually, I think that New Years and Christmas are my two most depressing times of the year because whenever they come around I always think that I've wasted another year. Anyway, good luck accomplishing your resolutions, and I hope they help.
I am on page 71 of this blog now, which is quite amazing considering I never had the intention of making this book length, but now I’m sure it could fill a paperback. Perhaps one day when I am long dead someone will publish this and young hackers can read it. This is assuming hack gets super popular and kids want to read my blog in 100 years. Who knows, but now if it ever happens I would’ve predicted it and it will be quite the coincidence.
Either way, I’m sitting here on my bed, laptop on lap. I love my laptop, I really do, it is just the right size (15.4 inches diagonally) and the keyboard pops with just the right sound and just the right resistance. It is dirty because of where I have placed my hands, the sweat of my palms dissolving a little bit of the finish away. I like to think this makes it look broken in.
On top of my screen sits a new footbag I made yesterday. It is red and blue, quite bouncy, and I’ve been working super hard to break it in. Me and Mike played with it today and it did alright, but you really have to work for it to stall, so perhaps a bit more time in the pocket is needed. Whatever, its only a day old.
Like I said, Mike and I took to the basement today, and even though I was sore I managed to have a good deal of fun playing with Mike again. His style is always really nice to watch and he hits a lot of stuff that surprises me (and him too). Just random tricks first try like pixie ss swirl and stuff. He does a good job mixing it up. If he gets consistent he could really do a lot for the east coast.
The rest of the day was spent getting the new car my parents bought. It is a Subaru Tribeca, which is an SUV but a little bit streamlined, so its not this huge gas guzzling thing, although it does not get very good gas mileage. We got it because the car we normally use to haul shit around (the car I drove, picture a few pages back) got in two accidents recently and ended up getting totaled. So, new car, which is cool I guess. It’s this weird dark brown shiny color. But it’s cool.
After that I ate some pasta and went to my friend’s house where I played monopoly. I really believe the oranges are the best spot on the board, and I realized this because if you go to jail it sets you up right in front of them. Any 6, 8, or 9 will get you on those orange squares. It just seems like a popular place to land. I ended up hoteling all the purple and all the orange and it really helped me out. A solid win for DC.
I got more information about an internship for this summer today. I have to submit my resume and 3 interesting facts about myself for the internship. It’s a pretty hip company which is why they asked the thing about the facts. It’s also funny that their list of required skills includes a liking of ping pong. So I really really hope I get the gig. I think my three interesting facts will be:
1) Ranked 4th in the world at professional hacky sack.
2) Enjoys writing short stories.
3) Practices card magic and assorted slight of hand in free time.
4) Operates small business selling hand made hacky sacks.
Well, that’s 4. So I have to get rid of one. Hm… I don’t know. Either way, I have some good facts about myself.
Oh, and today in the mail I got this sick package from Ashley with all this polish candy and its frikken amazing and I’m really happy she remembered I loved it. Go Poland.
That’s about it for tonight I think. Tomorrow my order of magic stuff is supposed to get here that I ordered with some xmas money. Oh! Maybe ill post a video if I learn anything new. Steve will bitch at me if I post magic on footbag.org though. Hm… we shall see. Maybe I’ll make a footbag disappear and then it will be ok.
Last note: why is footbag still underlined red in Microsoft word? Someone please fix that shit.
hey david. man, ill just come right out and say it; i think youre awesome. basically, i look up to you so much, you have no idea. your new years eve post nails how i feel, and we have so much in common, as i found out at nyj, its crazy. im so glad someone so high up in footbag is so similar to myself, it really gives me lots of hope. until now, ive always seen footbag pros as just machines that just footbag all day long. but after meeting you and reading your blog a few times, i realize you are a person, and someone i can relate to. i wish we could hang out more man, i had so much fun with you in chicago doing magic. ii really hope we get to hang out at us oppens, because i think you are a cool person. later man.
david wrote:Last note: why is footbag still underlined red in Microsoft word? Someone please fix that shit.
haha, word. i try to write about footbag in as many school projects as possible, and i get upset every time it comes up in the spell check. it's like they ae making fun of us or some thing!
Yeah I used - 'add to dictionary' I think. I guess you can't do that at scool labs though. You can do the same in firefox. I don't use MS word anymore anyway.
Hey dude. I do some sleight-of-hand myself. Mostly cards. I've learned from books and from my dad who learned from Bill Malone which is pretty cool. If I was at NYJ for more than like 2 hours and knew that you were interested in card magic then we could have sessioned. Oh well.
I'd recommend checking out The Royal Road to Card Magic series if you haven't already. It's in depth and gracefully teaches the true essentials.
Take care. Good luck!
-Eric Siegel: The man, the myth, the legend
Words of Wisdom from Rockey:
"hittin' ripped warrior bsos: that's a paddlin';
hittin' stepping diving whirl: that's a paddlin;
hittin' montage: you better believe that's a paddlin'"
You are one of the deepest people i know. most people do not have the ability to open up like you and i think it's a good idea that you have this blog because i think it lets you think about things a lot. it's healthy for you. congratulations on setting yourself goals and thinking about your future.
Hot off the needle green/light blue amaretta bag, 57 grams, ready for shred basically the day you get it. $32, shipping INCLUDED. Non-toxic tungsten fill. $30 if you want to fill it yourself with your own filler (like lead or something).
First PM gets it. Check/paypal accepted. Goes out the next day.
