wow so sad. i'm so sorry Aaron thats awful. it sounds like you did your part, and i really hope you had a prenup/your wife isn't too awful of a human being and this can go smooth for you and your daughter.
You're a great, resourceful guy, i know you'll bounce back. wish i had something more profound and thoughtful to say but thinking of you and sending good vibes your way homie.
Double AA's Footblog - Feeling Lost!!!
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h0ag3yb3atZ
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Re: Double AA's Footblog - Feeling Lost!!!
Kevin Hogan
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F[uns]tylin' Eclectic
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Re: Double AA's Footblog - Feeling Lost!!!
Tough read. So sorry to hear the news. Honestly though... It sounds like you're going to be happier now. Chris sounds like she's become a negative aspect of your life. Also one reason I'm not that into drinking. I've been cutting all negative things out of my life lately and it feels so good. I hope you can see the sunny sides to this dark patch in your life. If you need an ear, you know where to find me. Good luck bro.
Re: Double AA's Footblog - Feeling Lost!!!
In moving forward, I would focus on being SPOTLESS. When you're responsible for Taylor, do everything right. Be everywhere on time. Be courteous. Be respectful. Offer to go the extra mile. Do not get angry. Do not yell.
When you know she's drinking or going to a hotel or doing something that probably isn't in the best interest of your child, write it down. Keep a record. Keep emails. Mark the date. Whatever financial information you have access to, take screenshots. Monitor her spending and her activities (discretely, and only what you're legally allowed to access... don't get into personal accounts or hack passwords, etc...).
The courts ARE NOT in your favor in any way whatsoever. You are facing an uphill battle in every regard of this situation. (For example, I have a buddy who got an amicable divorce. His ex, who never really wanted to be a mom, wrote a letter to the judge very clearly describing how she is not interested in custody because she's really not the best person to have their daughter. She made it clear that she wanted her ex-husband to have full custody because he's a great parent and the better choice for their daughter. The letter was notarized. Official. The judge took one look and threw it out and STILL tried to award custody to the mom... simply because she's the mom).
Don't let on that you are gathering ammunition. Don't indicate that you are preparing to wage war. Take the high road. Get back to anger management counseling whether you think you need it or not. Make efforts that you can show the court.
This is the ONLY way that you will have any leverage whatsoever. The moment she says that she is even remotely worried that you could be a danger to your daughter (which she will), you will be under the microscope.
Be prepared. Good luck.
When you know she's drinking or going to a hotel or doing something that probably isn't in the best interest of your child, write it down. Keep a record. Keep emails. Mark the date. Whatever financial information you have access to, take screenshots. Monitor her spending and her activities (discretely, and only what you're legally allowed to access... don't get into personal accounts or hack passwords, etc...).
The courts ARE NOT in your favor in any way whatsoever. You are facing an uphill battle in every regard of this situation. (For example, I have a buddy who got an amicable divorce. His ex, who never really wanted to be a mom, wrote a letter to the judge very clearly describing how she is not interested in custody because she's really not the best person to have their daughter. She made it clear that she wanted her ex-husband to have full custody because he's a great parent and the better choice for their daughter. The letter was notarized. Official. The judge took one look and threw it out and STILL tried to award custody to the mom... simply because she's the mom).
Don't let on that you are gathering ammunition. Don't indicate that you are preparing to wage war. Take the high road. Get back to anger management counseling whether you think you need it or not. Make efforts that you can show the court.
This is the ONLY way that you will have any leverage whatsoever. The moment she says that she is even remotely worried that you could be a danger to your daughter (which she will), you will be under the microscope.
Be prepared. Good luck.
Darren Kautz
Kicking since 1991
Kicking since 1991
Re: Double AA's Footblog - Feeling Lost!!!
Hey man, I'm sorry all of this is happening to you. Keep posting on here, if it helps you - we can handle it. Can't really say much in terms of advice. Best of luck to you.
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boyle
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Re: Double AA's Footblog - Feeling Lost!!!
Heavy stuff man, hope things go well from here. Sounded like a pretty toxic time.