Shit

HG · Post by HG » 17 Feb 2005 17:59

Here is a topic where you put all your shit stories into. We had one earlier but it got killed.

Ill start it off.

Today i wiped from the front (abnormal) and got shit all over my forearm. Not cool. Not cool.

I wanted to have a poll, but i cant put one in. Which direction do you wipe from?

This thread may be immature and pointless, but i think that these topics are pretty interesting. Story time is never bad

mosher · Post by **mosher** » 17 Feb 2005 18:59

Both sides.

(I am serious)

david · Post by **david** » 17 Feb 2005 19:18

hahahahaha omg, that is disgusting.

zachatree · Post by **zachatree** » 17 Feb 2005 19:35

hen... are u jokeing?

Seath · Post by **Seath** » 17 Feb 2005 19:36

I shit in a dry toilett this morning.

and that's as much as I care to share about my darriere and what comes from there.

slapdash21 · Post by **slapdash21** » 19 Feb 2005 10:55

the original shit topic isnt far away...
http://modified.ca/footbag/viewtopic.php?t=7357

its funny too...the event that started the first thread re-ocurred...another little kid shit in my pool. but this time i didnt mind...my boss showed up and dealt with it himself. its funny because he doesnt follow the regulations that he makes us follow...there is like an official procedure to follow, but he just got it out of the pool with a shovel

and the pool was shut down for a few hours, so i hung out an got paid.

brian relly · Post by **brian relly** » 19 Feb 2005 11:04

Speaking of shit, it's probably a good idea to defecate and/or urinate before you shred. This improves your performance immensely, in my opinion.

slapdash21 · Post by **slapdash21** » 19 Feb 2005 11:16

i definitely agree. i also dont think its good to eat too much or drink too much right before shredding...like today when i had a steak and cheese sub and tried to shred. after like 5 minutes i collapsed. but yeah, if you piss right before you shred, you might be TOO relaxed (especially if its one of those really nice pisses), but overall its better to get it out.

brian relly · Post by **brian relly** » 19 Feb 2005 11:52

Well if you eat first, all the blood is down in your digestion system digesting the food you just ate, instead of flowing through your muslces like it ought to be. I usually wait at least 1-2 hours after eating before I shred.

Chris Holden · Post by **Chris Holden** » 19 Feb 2005 12:03

Lies! Stephen ALWAYS brings a sandwich to shred, and eats it mid-session! BUSTED! LOL

brian relly · Post by **brian relly** » 19 Feb 2005 12:07

I SO haven't done that in a while. But yes, I did used to do that.

Anz · Post by **Anz** » 19 Feb 2005 12:42

Stephen Barnes wrote:Well if you eat first, all the blood is down in your digestion system digesting the food you just ate, instead of flowing through your muslces like it ought to be. I usually wait at least 1-2 hours after eating before I shred.

WTF?!
Have you been awake on your biology classes?
Oh dear, oh dear... I don't know where to start. Blood doesn't digest your food. Blood doesn't go to any certain place when you have finnished your meal. Blood in muscles doesn't keep you going.

1) your blood suger level keeps you energic.
2) if your stomach is FULL, your whole body kinda wants to relax and that's why shredding is frustrating.

Oh shit - explaining biology stuff in english sure is hard.

brian relly · Post by **brian relly** » 19 Feb 2005 13:11

I have quite a healthy A in my Biology class.
When your body is digesting food, the blood vessels in your digestive system dialate, while constricting in other places, bringing more oxygen and the such to your digestive system so it can do its work. I never said blood is what digests your food. The reason you feel relaxed/sleepy after you eat is beause there's less blood (and thus less oxygen) getting to your brain, because most of it is diverted to your digestive system.
I'm also quite aware that blood sugar and carbohydrates give you energy. That's why it's generally good to eat a lot of carbohydrates 1-2 HOURS before you shred, so that it has time to digest, and you have your energy.

Anz · Post by **Anz** » 19 Feb 2005 14:53

Right, first - I do know what I'm talking here. And I think that you obliviously (sp?) do not.

Stephen Barnes wrote:I never said blood is what digests your food.

Oh really? Then, what does this mean:

--- all the blood is down in your digestion system digesting the food you just ate ---

OK... As I said - blood doesn't gather to anywhere at some special time. Blood just flows the same speed, the same pace.

Oh my lord... just look at this:

The reason you feel relaxed/sleepy after you eat is beause there's less blood (and thus less oxygen) getting to your brain, because most of it is diverted to your digestive system.

That's sooo bullshit.

It would be even dangerous to have less oxygen in your brains!!
What digests food? Well blood doesn't have anything to do with that, I tell you. It's the stomach acids and spit who digest. Then the food squeezes through the stomach "walls", as small particles, to blood.

In human body there are two routes for blood from the heart to body: short and long circulations (or whatever that those are called in English)
Short circulation is from the heart to brains. A very short route, so that blood doesn't hand over all the oxygen for the other parts of body, but straightly to the brains.
Long circulation is from the heart to the other parts of the body, ending to toes and fingers - including stomach.
And anything - ANYTHING - you do doesn't effect to your blood circulation system. ONLY when you are under a heavy physical work and your pulse gets higher, your blood circulates faster. But even that doesn't gather blood anywhere.

I hope you haven't been cheating in your biology tests

The thing you just said give me more reasons to doubt the education systems of North America. No personal offence to anybody - but the education system seems to really sucks ass there.

slapdash21 · Post by **slapdash21** » 19 Feb 2005 15:09

ana_ali wrote:The thing you just said give me more reasons to doubt the education systems of North America. No personal offence to anybody - but the education system seems to really sucks ass there.

jesus. i agree somewhat, but things arent THAT much better elsewhere. and i dont care for foreigners bad-mouthing american anything. also, while shit does have a lot to do with biology, this bickering about biology is getting quite off-topic...
and speaking of education...its a lot more common to say "no offense"

Colin · Post by **Colin** » 19 Feb 2005 17:18

slapdash21 wrote:..and i dont care for foreigners bad-mouthing american anything. also, while shit does have a lot to do with biology, this bickering about biology is getting quite off-topic...
and speaking of education...its a lot more common to say "no offense"

...

First off, the "shut up, [my country/my religion/my race/my gender] is great" defence is just ignorant. Sticks and stones, friend. Ana_ali is only talking. If you disagree with what he says, feel free to tell him so, but don't expect the entire world to agree with you just because you'd like it that way.

Second, it's a depressing world when someone complains that a useless (in any practical sense) thread has gone off topic, especially when it goes off into a direction that is infinately more productive.

Third, 'no personal offence' made perfect sense. He DID mean an offence to the education system, but he DIDN'T mean any offence to Stephen (or you, for that matter, even though you took it).

As for the topic at hand, Ana_ali, you DO agree that it's a bad idea to shred/do pretty well any physical activity soon after a big meal, right? I'm sure that Europeans get stitches (those sharpish stomach aches from exercise right after eating) just as well as North Americans. What's your explaination for those?

As for shit, I stepped in a whopper the other day.

Iain · Post by **Iain** » 19 Feb 2005 17:44

shitting feels good on the a**hole

ericksonj · Post by **ericksonj** » 19 Feb 2005 17:50

Yeah come on I want to hear more shit stories damn it, enough with this biology crap. My favorite disgusting shit experience was when I went into a dairy queen and went to take a piss in the only stand up urinal, and some one had taken a full on shit in there. Grossed me out, and no I waited to take a piss until I got home.

Or this other time when my friend got drunk and went to this dudes party that he didn't like and took a shit in his shoe. The guy got up the next morning with an interesting little suprise, and no I do not condone that shit.

Shit.

shreddaily · Post by **shreddaily** » 19 Feb 2005 18:39

Thank you, Anssi, for the edjucation lesson.
What I've learned:
There are some europeaners who are just as arogant and ignorant as us Americaners are suposed to be.
Its easy to argue around a point, spewing ones own knowlegde while completly ignoring the valitdity of anothers. Much like George Bush.

Wow we realy are all alike.

LittleBoy footbag · Post by **LittleBoy footbag** » 19 Feb 2005 18:41

gahh...I wanna tell this one I had this summer in Philippines....I prolly already told here aorund though so here goes:

I was eating fish in our house in Phillipines which I thought was the greatest thing since unsliced bread....so I ate like, 5 fishes....it was sooooo good.........but while I was watching a show, I felt some bad movement....so I tried to sleep it off.......then I woke up feeling like...well, shit. Then I watched some t.v.....while invader zim was on, the big one happened. so I tried to squeeze it in like some of you do when you're loads away from a bathroom..............it didn't work out.....so I farted all 5 fishes I had for lunch into my boxers and I yelled fuck!!...fortunately, no one understands english too wel where I lived in Philippines. Anyways, I ran to the far-ass bathroom and plopped my ass down on the ground............right after that, I opened the gates....and all hell broke....out. I was there for like, at least an hour or so......then my mom told me my rectumn'll pop out if I shit anymore......